soft language

On the Softening of Language: George Carlin's Observations


The phrase "soft language" was first used by George Carlin to describe the linguistic metamorphosis of words and expressions that tend to sanitize or mask the unpleasant or harsh aspects of life. The employment of euphemisms or more politically correct terminology to describe commonplace items is a common linguistic phenomena. The comic insanity of these language alterations is highlighted by Carlin's razor-sharp wit and astute observations. Here are some examples:


Toilet paper became bathroom tissue.

Trash became waste disposal material.


Sneakers became running shoes.

Sneakers became athletic footwear.


False teeth became dental appliances.

False teeth became oral prosthetics.


Medicine became medication.

Medicine became pharmaceuticals.


Information became directory assistance.

Information became data retrieval services.


The dump became the landfill.

The dump became the waste disposal site.


Car crashes became automobile accidents.

Car crashes became vehicular incidents.


Partly cloudy became partly sunny.

Partly cloudy became intermittently sunny.


Motels became motor lodges.

Motels became roadside accommodations.


House trailers became mobile homes.

House trailers became portable residences.


Used cars became previously owned transportation.

Used cars became pre-owned vehicles.


Room service became guest-room dining.

Room service became in-room dining.


Constipation became occasional irregularity.

Constipation became sporadic digestive discomfort.


Going to the hospital and seeing a doctor became going to a health maintenance organization or a wellness center to consult a healthcare delivery professional.


Poor people living in slums became the economically disadvantaged occupying substandard housing in the inner cities.


People being broke due to job loss became individuals facing a negative cash-flow position due to redundancies in the workforce.

Old age became the golden years.

Old age became the retirement phase.


Prison became correctional facility.

Prison became a rehabilitation center.


Drunk became under the influence.

Drunk became intoxicated.


Death became passing away or joining the heavenly choir.

Death became the end of life.


Cemetery became memorial park.

Cemetery became a resting place.


War became armed conflict.

War became a military engagement.


Fired from a job became let go or made redundant.

Fired from a job became job separation.


Garbage collector became sanitation engineer.

Garbage collector became waste management specialist.


Unemployed became between jobs.

Unemployed became job-seeking.


Layoffs became rightsizing.

Layoffs became workforce optimization.


Obese became weight-challenged.

Obese became having a higher BMI.


Dirty or filthy became unclean.

Dirty or filthy became not meeting hygiene standards.


Global warming became climate change.

Global warming became environmental fluctuations.


Poor became economically disadvantaged.

Poor became financially challenged.


Smoking became tobacco use.

Smoking became tobacco consumption.


Prostitute became sex worker.

Prostitute became adult industry professional.


Illegal immigrant became undocumented immigrant.

Illegal immigrant became unauthorized resident.


Firing a gun became discharging a firearm.

Firing a gun became using a firearm.


Prayer in school became moments of silence.

Prayer in school became reflection time.


Spam (email) became unsolicited commercial email.

Spam became unrequested electronic messages.

The humor of Carlin serves as a reminder of how language may change to make the disagreeable more tolerable or the stark reality of life less intimidating.